Makeup, schmakeup

My name is Courtney and I’m makeup challenged.

*gasp*

Yes, it is true. I am a 32 year old woman and I just don’t wear it.

It cuts into my sleep time. The time other people spend applying their makeup I use to sleep. That and it is entirely waaaay too complicated. At least I think so.

mascara

Mascara – I can do that… except it gets all over the place and my eyelashes are on crack. They curl every whichaway except for the right way. Putting mascara on cracked out lashes is a no go. And before you mention eyelash curlers, don’t. I’ve used the scissor looking ones, the heated ones, the crimp kind… all they do is put a crease in em. And my eyelashes just giggle at the attempt and go on about their day.

My eyebrows are alright. I used to get them waxed. Waxing is the devil. I will never forget the first time I got my eyebrows waxed. Paula Ann did one eye. It took everything short of a miracle for me not to walk out of the shop with just one eye done. That mess HURT! After the waxing fiasco, I would just get them tweezed. For some reason tweezing doesn’t hurt. Since I moved away from my Paula Ann, now I get them threaded. And I only get them threaded for the shape. I have to warn the person threading them to not go too thin. I don’t wanna have to draw anything or constantly look surprised. I keep them clean in between.

lipstick

Lipstick – I have a few pencils and glosses. And two tubes of lipstick. All from MAC. All at the suggestion of the makeup artist I con… uh convince to help me find something because I am absolutely clueless. Problem is, they always do a hint extra and I can never duplicate it.

eyeshadow

Eyeshadow – the same problem holds true here. I have some really nice shadows. I’ve gone in to Sephora and MAC and Macys and Nordstrom and Bloomingdales… I’ve had makeup artists show me some really simple things that are cute for going out or keeping it cute. Again, I can’t ever duplicate it.

I used to have a MAC store that I frequented and I went to the same artist. Her name was Courtney and she had the same birthday as me. We became makeup friends. She’d spend the time to explain things and really help me out. Since the move, all of the rest of the stores and artists don’t compare.

blush

Blush – I fear looking like Ronald McDonald. Or a clown with rosy red circles on their cheeks. My skin is the color of chocolate – dark chocolate. No thank you to red rosy circles on my dark skin. Nope. Granted, I’m sure there are ways of applying and wearing blush correctly, but I don’t know how. So nope.

foundation

Foundation – honestly, I have yet to find a company that has something even remotely close to my skin tone. I have whatever the name/number of the foundation is for MAC that’s as close as you can get to my skin color, but I can tell when I look at myself in the mirror it looks bad. I don’t wanna look dead. And that’s what bad foundation looks like to me. I once went to a Mary Kay party and the woman selling and displaying the products told me that my skin was gorgeous and I didn’t need foundation. I’m just gonna stick with her advice for the rest of my life.

So today, I went on YouTube determined to work on my eyeshadow skills. Uhhh… people. This is scary. While I know that everything takes some practice and getting used to, I might just keep my Team Natural membership active for life. Team Natural as in some lip gloss and clean eyebrows and keep it pushing.

I’ll give it 30 days. And I’ll actually make the effort and try. And maybe even post one or two pictures. Wish me luck.

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